So a for a month I was stuck obsessing over nothing but praying and reading the Bible and I was so worried that I would never be able to live other Christian life cause i was constantly falling short and I was terriefed of hell and unwanted thoughts kept coming into my head the more I tried to get rid of them the worse they became then I was obsessed with trying to stop
but it just kept getting worse and worse and eventually i stopped trying and the thoughts went away and then soon after I started getting depressed and having anxiety about hell and then I started reading the Bible but I have trouble focusing on reading it
and I get distracted easily and when I'm reading it I have to keep starting over reading cause I forgot what was even going on and then my depression got worse o the point I just sat around questioning life and existence and then everything started just feeling like a dream or fake or something
Then transfer to now and I started drawing and I'm happy again but it seems as if I can only focus on one thing at a time cause like I used to play a video game and pretty much just do it and not really anything else or I would pray and read the Bible and nothing else and now I started drawing but I can't seem to remember to do anything else
it's like as if my mind only works to obsess over one thing at a time and nothing else I can't even read the Bible since my mind goes crazy
I don't know how to live the Christian life and live a normal life so I don't get so depressed that I can't do anything I am trying so hard but I keep failing and well I don't really know what to do it's a lose-lose cause if I try to focus on God then I get depressed and can't focus anymore if I do something entertaining I get lost doing that and can't focus on God
why do I have to be like this why can't I just be normal
Submitted January 12, 2017 at 12:10PM by Unknown
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